“But everyone else has one!”

This refers to a child’s desire – often expressed very urgently to their parents – to finally get their own smartphone. It is not easy to stand firm in such situations. “I don’t want my child to be an outsider” is a frequently heard argument – and sometimes also an excuse to avoid what may to become a difficult discussion. But who hasn’t seen the images of children and teenagers sitting side by side, hunched over their black boxes? Driven by the fear of missing out? FOMO (fear of missing out), as it is known in technical jargon! A feeling that is deliberately evoked by the structure of social media.¹ But the question remains: how do we protect our children and young people from slipping into a digital world associated with psychologically harmful content, psychiatric symptoms and addictive behaviour? Parents are therefore called upon to tackle the task and protect their children and young people from the pitfalls and dangers of digital media.² However, it would be easy to join forces, as many parents want to keep their children and young people away from undesirable content on the internet and (mostly) anti-social media, but feel that they are alone in this.

Goal 14+

Some families from the municipality Sorengo in our southern canton Ticino are leading the way. They have joined forces in the “Obiettivo 14+” association.³ “Obiettivo 14+” started with a few courageous fathers and mothers. Today, the association has over 30 members from Lugano area – and more than fifty children are benefiting from it. No, no, these are by no means technophobic parents who want their children to still communicate with a tin can telephone, but rather they want to instil in their offspring a sense of JOMO (joy of missing out), namely the joy of not having to be part of it.
  The name of their association means Goal 14+ in English. Membership is linked to a “Patto digitale”, a digital pact in which parents undertake not to provide their child with any personal digital devices connected to the internet until they reach the age of 14. This includes smartphones, tablets, smartwatches, game consoles, PCs (and all other devices that can connect to the internet). Personal means that the device was purchased for the child or is freely available to them – and that should not be the case. To enable telephone communication between parents and children, a newly produced “dumbphone” in the style of an old Nokia device is recommended, the use of which is limited to phone calls and sending text messages. A personal account on (un)social media is only permitted from the age of 16 on.

A careful introduction
to the digital world

The “Patto digitale” can be found on the association’s website.⁴ Parents can use it – with slight variations, but essentially unchanged – for their family’s needs. It provides them with carefully thought-out and helpful guidelines on how to organise their family life in today’s technology-obsessed world. Parents are encouraged to participate in their children’s digital world. Parents’ devices or a shared PC or laptop are available in commonly accessible places such as the living room and kitchen. The rules, which are transparent to everyone, include fixed times and a precisely defined limited period of use. This gives children an insight into the advantages of the internet when searching for information, while at the same time teaching them to use devices consciously and responsibly. To prevent access to inappropriate content, special filters or blocks may need to be installed. The obligation to participate in the training offered as part of the membership makes it easier for parents to stick to their guns and stay on task.

Why no urgency?

It is easy to see that such regulated use of digital devices places demands on parents in many ways. Not only do they have to withstand what may be intense pressure from their children, but they also have to familiarise themselves with the technical aspects of responsible internet use. Not all parents are able to do this. This makes it all the more important for the federal government to introduce legal regulations and protective measures, as other countries have already done. It is astonishing that the Federal Council sees no real need for action in response to the postulates of National Councillor Maya Graf, Councillor of States Céline Vara and the motion of National Councillor Regina Durrer-Knobel.⁵ This raises the question: Why is the urgency of protecting our younger generation and the duty to support parents not recognised? Who has an interest in a disoriented and internally neglected youth?

Perhaps a tin can telephone after all?

In the meantime, parents have to help themselves, like those in Sorengo or those who have joined the Smartphone-Free Childhood association⁶. They can find many answers to pressing questions on the relevant websites. Here is one advantage of the internet: The answers on the Obiettivo 14+ website, which are written in Italian, can be translated into the desired language with a click using translation programmes. This makes it easier for parents to enjoy themselves with their children on the football pitch, build huts in the woods or have fun playing board games together in a warm living room in winter – a trip to the analogue world, where even a tin can telephone has its place. •

¹ Eliane Perret. “The smartphone, gift or joint project?”; https://www.zeit-fragen.ch/en/archives/2020/no-24-10-november-2020/the-smartphone-gift-or-joint-project
² Eliane Perret. “In the jungle of the internet”; https://www.zeit-fragen.ch/en/archives/2021/no-6-16-march-2021/in-the-jungle-of-the-internet
³ https://www.obiettivo14.ch/
⁴ https://www.obiettivo14.ch/
⁵ www.parlament.ch  Maya Graf, Postulat 24.4592; Céline Vara, Postulat 24.4480; Regina Durrer-Knobel, Motion 25.3473
⁶ https://www.smartphonefreiekindheit.ch